Saturday 21 April 2007

There are bad gigs and there are awful gigs!
On Thursday I came away from work feeling like a cheap whore that had just wanked a fat businessman off in a Travelodge!
My friend and apprentice JS accompanied me to the gig, we already had our misgivings but it was an opportunity to catch up with each other and enjoy a convivial evening making people laugh and earn a few bob for a our weekend's beer money.. He kindly offered to drive and the journey was uneventful and chatty.
How we laughed as we passed a run down pub with a similar name to the restaurant we were playing at, along with the obligatory hoodies on bikes outside. Mrs. Tom the sat nav woman informed us that we had "reached our destination" this couldn't be right? We are playing a restaurant and it's fifteen pund a ticket! Unfortunately Mrs. Tom was right as was her husband, Tom. The "restaurant" was annexed to the pub and our hearts sank. Mine sank even further when I saw the place and discovered only 12 tickets had been sold. This may have been due to the "marketing" which amounted to three fluorescent cardboard stars with our names written in felt tip pen!.
The pub itself was expected, more dirty ashtrays than customers. JS was asked if he'd like some food, his reply was priceless "No thanks I've ...er....seen the place".
We were then introduced to the compere for the evening who immediately starting firing questions at us like " So? How do you get into this comedy malarkey then?" and " What do you think of Peter Kay?" to the mind numbingly predictable "Isn't it shite that we can't do asylum seeker jokes anymore?" He then "warmed up" the audience with a selection of "jokes" that were too disgusting for even my ears. JS and I cringed and nursed our pints.
It was our turn, the pros's. JS did well it's ever so difficult playing to such a small crowd but his laid back approach made them feel comfortable in what were difficult circumstances. My mood was darkening but I went on and got through it, they enjoyed us because we delivered. Sometimes it has just got to be like that.
FTM!