The malaise is still here so I thought I'd do what a lot of blokes do when they're bored...compile lists!!
Heard Hunter Davis on radio yesterday talking about his new book of lists and that set me thinking of my favourite things. It's even sadder in a way because my 3 favourite albums haven't changed in ten years and then it took a album of seismic proportions to storm it's way in. Even my favourite films are decades old, not one film in the past 20 years has even made me want to go to the cinema to see it, Christ no wonder I'm seen as a saddo who lives in the past.
Top five albums:
All Mod Cons/The Jam
The Story of.../The Clash
High Land Hard Rain/Aztec Camera
Park Life/Blur
Swoon/Prefab Sprout
Top Five singles:
Down In The Tube Station at Midnight/The Jam
Complete Control/The Clash
This Is A Low/Blur
Laid/James
When You're Young/The Jam
admittedly the singles do change from time to time but only to jostle for higher positions!
Top five films:
Billy Liar
Oliver!
Saturday Night, Sunday Morning
Kes
Quadrophenia
Bubbling under are:
A Kind of Loving, Up The Junction, Top Secret!, Look Back In Anger and Scum!
Favourite footballers:
Colin Todd
Marco Gabbiadini
Eric Cantona
Kevin Phillips
Joe Bolton
Not many suprises there I suppose, Cantona is in there for his style and for THAT Kung Fu tackle on a racist little twat ten years ago..Hero!
FTM!
Tuesday, November 30, 2004
29 November 2004
Life's a bit shit at the moment, don't get me wrong, work is great and I'm enjoying every minute I have on stage. That's when I can truly be Roughy instead of having to be Mark most of the time. Mark is dull, Mark doesn't do anything but trawl 'round charity shops in the vain hope of finding decent books to read, Mark has tummy ache almost constantly these days and Mark misses his daughters and his friends.
My daughter M goes into hospital this week for a major operation, maybe that's why there's this malaise. I'll be with her in thought, spirit as her Mum doesn't seem to want me there. I'll be in touch with the hospital all the time so I can find out what's happening.
FTM!
My daughter M goes into hospital this week for a major operation, maybe that's why there's this malaise. I'll be with her in thought, spirit as her Mum doesn't seem to want me there. I'll be in touch with the hospital all the time so I can find out what's happening.
FTM!
Sunday, November 28, 2004
28 November 2004
Some strange gigs this weekend, all different and all pretty successful in their own way.
The gig in Halifax was a funny one, the nightclub in question has decided to open on a Thursday as a cafe bar, to attract custom they've been holding comedy nights using mainstream comics. The last couple were resounding successes, with an almost full house. When Roughy rolls in to town, what happens? We had to wait until late for an audience to turn up, I've been to bigger orgies! However they were a great crowd (?) and I worked my bollocks off for them. Result? Booked back in January for a larger fee if I handle the publicity etc.
Catleford was a very different affair for lot's of reasons. The evening started nicely as I took in a pint or two at one of my favourite pubs, The Elephant and Castle ("The Nelly") in Wakefield. It's managed by a good friend of mine and possibly the most miserable landlord in the world! I did cheer him up by taking a copy of the long since deleted "Chords" album from 1979. Strangely enough we'd known each other for 8 years before we found out we had a shared love of Mod revival music from the late 70's. The Nelly is one of those pubs that you often find opposite a main train station that has a an incredible way of reinventing itself as the day progresses, from casual passers by and people waiting for their connecting train to business people grabbing a sandwich and a pint oh and an awful lot of prison officers, as Wakefield top security prison is just down the road. I did actually meet one of my heros, Lord Longford, in there and carried his bags to the station. What a brave bloke he was, drinking for over 20 years in a pub full of screws all refusing to acknowledge he was there! As the night closes in the place starts to fill up with groups of lads, full of hair gel, crap ahirts and too many hormones as well as scantily clad young ladies out for a night on the infamous Wakefield "Westgate Run". Quick journey to Cas. I was doing a sportsman's dinner at the Rugby League club. Strangely I wasn't asked to be there for dinner and so hung around like the spare prick for three hours before I went on. The people were lovely though and I soon met many kindred spirits on the fire escape where we gathered to smoke. Whilst the speakers were speaking I did notice the noise level from a couple of the tables was rising.The compere, some Rugby League commentator from the BBC wasn't strong enough. By the time I came on I had to really lay in to them to get some order, including destroying a table of business women who thought that because they'd spent a fortune on the auction, that that gave them the right to talk through my set. A few choice words from me and the result was a round of applause from the real crowd and a table of red faced female executives! I had a storming gig and have been asked back to do a fund raiser for the supporters club. It was lovely being back in Cas. I have some fond memories of teaching there in the mid nineties, lot's of Vaux beer and shagging a prison officer's wife in the back of his Metro...something tells me despite his faith that Lord Longford would've approved!
Had a long journey to Leicestershire and to a great little working men's club in a delightful village. They were having a cabaret evening, me and sixties band called "Stranded In The Sixties". They were a smashing set of fellows and I sat with their various wives and girlfriends. I was concerned, as this was the first cabaret night the club had held for a long time and it was a full house, unfortunately it was like doing a gig to the cast of "Cocoon". I had to have a rethink on the act I had planned and went on to do squeaky clean, cheeky act that had them pissing themselves (literally in some unfortunate cases!). Re-booked for November next year!
To cap it all Sunderland AFC continued their fine form with a great win away to Stoke.
FTM
The gig in Halifax was a funny one, the nightclub in question has decided to open on a Thursday as a cafe bar, to attract custom they've been holding comedy nights using mainstream comics. The last couple were resounding successes, with an almost full house. When Roughy rolls in to town, what happens? We had to wait until late for an audience to turn up, I've been to bigger orgies! However they were a great crowd (?) and I worked my bollocks off for them. Result? Booked back in January for a larger fee if I handle the publicity etc.
Catleford was a very different affair for lot's of reasons. The evening started nicely as I took in a pint or two at one of my favourite pubs, The Elephant and Castle ("The Nelly") in Wakefield. It's managed by a good friend of mine and possibly the most miserable landlord in the world! I did cheer him up by taking a copy of the long since deleted "Chords" album from 1979. Strangely enough we'd known each other for 8 years before we found out we had a shared love of Mod revival music from the late 70's. The Nelly is one of those pubs that you often find opposite a main train station that has a an incredible way of reinventing itself as the day progresses, from casual passers by and people waiting for their connecting train to business people grabbing a sandwich and a pint oh and an awful lot of prison officers, as Wakefield top security prison is just down the road. I did actually meet one of my heros, Lord Longford, in there and carried his bags to the station. What a brave bloke he was, drinking for over 20 years in a pub full of screws all refusing to acknowledge he was there! As the night closes in the place starts to fill up with groups of lads, full of hair gel, crap ahirts and too many hormones as well as scantily clad young ladies out for a night on the infamous Wakefield "Westgate Run". Quick journey to Cas. I was doing a sportsman's dinner at the Rugby League club. Strangely I wasn't asked to be there for dinner and so hung around like the spare prick for three hours before I went on. The people were lovely though and I soon met many kindred spirits on the fire escape where we gathered to smoke. Whilst the speakers were speaking I did notice the noise level from a couple of the tables was rising.The compere, some Rugby League commentator from the BBC wasn't strong enough. By the time I came on I had to really lay in to them to get some order, including destroying a table of business women who thought that because they'd spent a fortune on the auction, that that gave them the right to talk through my set. A few choice words from me and the result was a round of applause from the real crowd and a table of red faced female executives! I had a storming gig and have been asked back to do a fund raiser for the supporters club. It was lovely being back in Cas. I have some fond memories of teaching there in the mid nineties, lot's of Vaux beer and shagging a prison officer's wife in the back of his Metro...something tells me despite his faith that Lord Longford would've approved!
Had a long journey to Leicestershire and to a great little working men's club in a delightful village. They were having a cabaret evening, me and sixties band called "Stranded In The Sixties". They were a smashing set of fellows and I sat with their various wives and girlfriends. I was concerned, as this was the first cabaret night the club had held for a long time and it was a full house, unfortunately it was like doing a gig to the cast of "Cocoon". I had to have a rethink on the act I had planned and went on to do squeaky clean, cheeky act that had them pissing themselves (literally in some unfortunate cases!). Re-booked for November next year!
To cap it all Sunderland AFC continued their fine form with a great win away to Stoke.
FTM
Thursday, November 25, 2004
25 November 2004
I've got a sore knee today, it's blown up like one of Dev Alahan's shops!
The weekend looms and tonight I'm in Halifax, a lovely little town I used to spend a lot of time in, especially at Christmas. It's a pub gig tonight, I don't do a lot of them but they really do take me back to my roots. I love to see the faces of the people I'm playing to and despite it being free entry I think I've enough in my tank to take on a rowdy crowd, in fact that's just what I need.
I'll let you know all about my shenanigans on Monday after the weekend's blast
FTM!
The weekend looms and tonight I'm in Halifax, a lovely little town I used to spend a lot of time in, especially at Christmas. It's a pub gig tonight, I don't do a lot of them but they really do take me back to my roots. I love to see the faces of the people I'm playing to and despite it being free entry I think I've enough in my tank to take on a rowdy crowd, in fact that's just what I need.
I'll let you know all about my shenanigans on Monday after the weekend's blast
FTM!
Tuesday, November 23, 2004
Tuesday 23 November 2004
It's been a funny couple of days, like waiting to see if the brown envelope is A5 or A4!
Saw in the news today that a certain ex Liverpool and Coventry player has been accused of using racist comments at a dinner in Darlington, do these twats never learn? In the week we've had, with the shite hurled at England players in Spain and the crass comments made by porn meister David Sullivan regarding Dwight Yorke, you would think that people in the public eye would keep their filthy thoughts to themselves. The player in question, DS was always an edgy player and I for one will never forget Gary Bennett (Sunderland's first Black Captain) booting him into the stands a few years ago. Gary Bennett now does stirling work with my new best friend Kieron Brady for an anti racist campaign aimed at schoolkids. I bet Benno would love to "Speedily" kick the racist little tosser back into the stands! I do find it ironic that this story appeared in The Sun, a newspaper that made a saint of a certain, just dead England captain despite me telling all and sundry that he was a bigot. Fleet Street (or is it Wapping?) never listens to Roughy!
Rant over!
FTM!
Saw in the news today that a certain ex Liverpool and Coventry player has been accused of using racist comments at a dinner in Darlington, do these twats never learn? In the week we've had, with the shite hurled at England players in Spain and the crass comments made by porn meister David Sullivan regarding Dwight Yorke, you would think that people in the public eye would keep their filthy thoughts to themselves. The player in question, DS was always an edgy player and I for one will never forget Gary Bennett (Sunderland's first Black Captain) booting him into the stands a few years ago. Gary Bennett now does stirling work with my new best friend Kieron Brady for an anti racist campaign aimed at schoolkids. I bet Benno would love to "Speedily" kick the racist little tosser back into the stands! I do find it ironic that this story appeared in The Sun, a newspaper that made a saint of a certain, just dead England captain despite me telling all and sundry that he was a bigot. Fleet Street (or is it Wapping?) never listens to Roughy!
Rant over!
FTM!
Monday, November 22, 2004
November 21 2004
Busy weekend, lot's heartache, laughs and hard work.
Friday 19 November
Father's need justice too!
Decent run up to Sunderland, then a change of plans meant I was mooching around for most of the afternoon.
Travelled to tonight's gig with "Super Sub" himself David fairclough, ex. Liverpool legend. He was doing a dinner at another venue in town. My gig was with Alan Kennedy, the venue was full and there were lot's of faces I recognised in the crowd. There were problems with the sound again (why can't venues get this right, it really spoils the night when the crowd are struggling to hear what the guest speaker is saying) nevertheless AK went down a storm and with new batteries for the mic sorted (courtesy of my emergency supply) I took the stage and really had a great gig, they laughed in all the right places, were very attentive and I ended up getting a standing ovation in my home city..it doesn't often get better than that!
Saturday 20 November
Had a lovely couple of hours with my daughter, we went to a pub and for the first time in my life I ordered a pot of tea and a coffee...in a pub!!
Popped into one of my favourite venues, The Magnesia Bank in North Shields. Turns out that the landlord's wife recently won "Pudding Chef" of the year at a swanky night in that London, well done Dee, we Mackems are taking over North Tyneside!The real reason I went, was to see if the posters for my Christmas Roadshow were up, they were, but not enough of them, what an ego I have! And seemingly there's romance in the air at The Maggy!
The evening gig was in a tiny pit village in County Durham, amazingly it was a Pigeon Fanciers annual do (I kid you not) I was on with a really feisty club singer who got the crowd going. I didn't, unfortunately. I sort of guessed it would be hard as the average age of the crowd was about 200. I did ok and had to tone some stuff down, did 40 minutes and went off to decent applause. I was approached by a guy afterwards who told me I was "too blue son, too blue".
FTM!
Friday 19 November
Father's need justice too!
Decent run up to Sunderland, then a change of plans meant I was mooching around for most of the afternoon.
Travelled to tonight's gig with "Super Sub" himself David fairclough, ex. Liverpool legend. He was doing a dinner at another venue in town. My gig was with Alan Kennedy, the venue was full and there were lot's of faces I recognised in the crowd. There were problems with the sound again (why can't venues get this right, it really spoils the night when the crowd are struggling to hear what the guest speaker is saying) nevertheless AK went down a storm and with new batteries for the mic sorted (courtesy of my emergency supply) I took the stage and really had a great gig, they laughed in all the right places, were very attentive and I ended up getting a standing ovation in my home city..it doesn't often get better than that!
Saturday 20 November
Had a lovely couple of hours with my daughter, we went to a pub and for the first time in my life I ordered a pot of tea and a coffee...in a pub!!
Popped into one of my favourite venues, The Magnesia Bank in North Shields. Turns out that the landlord's wife recently won "Pudding Chef" of the year at a swanky night in that London, well done Dee, we Mackems are taking over North Tyneside!The real reason I went, was to see if the posters for my Christmas Roadshow were up, they were, but not enough of them, what an ego I have! And seemingly there's romance in the air at The Maggy!
The evening gig was in a tiny pit village in County Durham, amazingly it was a Pigeon Fanciers annual do (I kid you not) I was on with a really feisty club singer who got the crowd going. I didn't, unfortunately. I sort of guessed it would be hard as the average age of the crowd was about 200. I did ok and had to tone some stuff down, did 40 minutes and went off to decent applause. I was approached by a guy afterwards who told me I was "too blue son, too blue".
FTM!
Thursday, November 18, 2004
Thursday 18 November 2004
Isn't Chinese food good for the soul? However, I have noticed recently, more and more Chinese takeaway's are using reshaped watery Chicken (not so much breast as lips and arseholes!). Having said that, I love that MSG rush you get after scoffing one and being able to go back to it later in the evening (Chicken Ping!) is one of life's delights.
It's my little girl's birthday tomorrow, M. Is two and beautiful with it. No doubt her house will be like last year, full of prezzies, toys and clothes. She is a credit to her Mum and I miss her.
North East gigs this weekend, so I'll get the chance to catch up with my mates and eat copious amounts of Saveloy dips, a North East delicacy made up of Saveloy, warm Peas Pudding and Sage and Onion stuffing on a bread bun dipped in lard..fantastic! only a pund at Jackie Whites Market.
Tomorrow night's gig is a dinner in Sunderland with Alan Kennedy, ex Liverpool and Sunderland defender. Alan is always good for a laugh so we should have a good night. I'm always nervous about hometown gigs, prophets in their own land and all that. But my people always treat me well so I am looking forward to it.
FTM!
It's my little girl's birthday tomorrow, M. Is two and beautiful with it. No doubt her house will be like last year, full of prezzies, toys and clothes. She is a credit to her Mum and I miss her.
North East gigs this weekend, so I'll get the chance to catch up with my mates and eat copious amounts of Saveloy dips, a North East delicacy made up of Saveloy, warm Peas Pudding and Sage and Onion stuffing on a bread bun dipped in lard..fantastic! only a pund at Jackie Whites Market.
Tomorrow night's gig is a dinner in Sunderland with Alan Kennedy, ex Liverpool and Sunderland defender. Alan is always good for a laugh so we should have a good night. I'm always nervous about hometown gigs, prophets in their own land and all that. But my people always treat me well so I am looking forward to it.
FTM!
Tuesday, November 16, 2004
Monday 15 November 2004
Christ on a bike! What a weekend!
Here goes.
Friday 12 November 2004
Friday was the day I was "doubling up" as we call it in the biz (!) A decent journey over to Hull, booked into a very nice and clean B&B changed in to my "DDG" suit (DDG= drop dead gorgeous!) and headed to Hessle for a fantastic little gig. The night was arranged as a suprise for a fifty year old geezer getting married next week (you would think he was old enough to know better!..don't do it Hull bloke!). I was working with two, ahem.....exotic dancers. They were very attractive and punctual, to be honest that doesn't always go hand in hand. I did a good spot, enjoyed by all and had some craic about Sunderland-Hull games of yesteryear. Quick taxi to the (very impressive) Hull KC Super stadium and literally walked in had half a pint and went on stage. I was following John Conteh, who, I was told was very impressive and " a difficult act to follow". Well follow him I did and went on to do one of the best gigs I've ever done at a sportsman's dinner. This was important to me as the gig was booked through the country's most important comedy agent, it was my first for them and I stormed it! Much laughter ensued afterwards when John Conteh asked for my autograph! despite my promises I did end up in a dodgy lapdance club and forgot the name of my B&B, a cracking night.
Saturday 13 November
Woke up with a hangover but one of the best sausage and bacon sarnies I've ever had put paid to that!
I drove to Chesterfield to catch up with some friends I hadn't seen for ages. J was unveiling his new false teeth..oh we gave him some grief for that!
The first gig in Nottingham had to be set up and it didn't look promising. The landlady looked very worried that the football team she'd booked the night for wouldn't turn up, I shared her fears. I dashed over to The City Ground (Home of Nottm Forest FC) and did a quick half hour set to a Christmas party crowd, It went well despite the crap sound. Meanwhile back at the first gig, the landlady had paid off the strippers and insisted I did my act to 6 audience members and four of her regulars (who insisted on standing behind me and heckling..tossers!). She then tried not to pay me, a nasty argument ensued, not helped by the fact that I was staying at the pub that night! she backed down in the end but it left a nasty taste.
Sunday 14 November
After an arkward silence in the morning, the landlady from the previous night, bid me farewell and I set off on the mega track to Methr Tydfil..A new one on me!
The gig was extraordinary, a dodgy nightclub packed to the rafters with young kids out of their heads on alco pops at £1 and pints at the same price. All I was asked to do was get on to the stage hurl some abuse at audience members and make them laugh! I was shitting it, but they liked me, so 12 minutes later I was on my way with silly money for what is after all a silly job.
FTM!
Here goes.
Friday 12 November 2004
Friday was the day I was "doubling up" as we call it in the biz (!) A decent journey over to Hull, booked into a very nice and clean B&B changed in to my "DDG" suit (DDG= drop dead gorgeous!) and headed to Hessle for a fantastic little gig. The night was arranged as a suprise for a fifty year old geezer getting married next week (you would think he was old enough to know better!..don't do it Hull bloke!). I was working with two, ahem.....exotic dancers. They were very attractive and punctual, to be honest that doesn't always go hand in hand. I did a good spot, enjoyed by all and had some craic about Sunderland-Hull games of yesteryear. Quick taxi to the (very impressive) Hull KC Super stadium and literally walked in had half a pint and went on stage. I was following John Conteh, who, I was told was very impressive and " a difficult act to follow". Well follow him I did and went on to do one of the best gigs I've ever done at a sportsman's dinner. This was important to me as the gig was booked through the country's most important comedy agent, it was my first for them and I stormed it! Much laughter ensued afterwards when John Conteh asked for my autograph! despite my promises I did end up in a dodgy lapdance club and forgot the name of my B&B, a cracking night.
Saturday 13 November
Woke up with a hangover but one of the best sausage and bacon sarnies I've ever had put paid to that!
I drove to Chesterfield to catch up with some friends I hadn't seen for ages. J was unveiling his new false teeth..oh we gave him some grief for that!
The first gig in Nottingham had to be set up and it didn't look promising. The landlady looked very worried that the football team she'd booked the night for wouldn't turn up, I shared her fears. I dashed over to The City Ground (Home of Nottm Forest FC) and did a quick half hour set to a Christmas party crowd, It went well despite the crap sound. Meanwhile back at the first gig, the landlady had paid off the strippers and insisted I did my act to 6 audience members and four of her regulars (who insisted on standing behind me and heckling..tossers!). She then tried not to pay me, a nasty argument ensued, not helped by the fact that I was staying at the pub that night! she backed down in the end but it left a nasty taste.
Sunday 14 November
After an arkward silence in the morning, the landlady from the previous night, bid me farewell and I set off on the mega track to Methr Tydfil..A new one on me!
The gig was extraordinary, a dodgy nightclub packed to the rafters with young kids out of their heads on alco pops at £1 and pints at the same price. All I was asked to do was get on to the stage hurl some abuse at audience members and make them laugh! I was shitting it, but they liked me, so 12 minutes later I was on my way with silly money for what is after all a silly job.
FTM!
Friday, November 12, 2004
November 12 2004
Last night I watched a fantastic DVD I picked up in that London the other week. "Punk in London" is a film made by a German geezer at the height of Punk(1977) it has some blistering footage, including The Jam at the 100 Club and early footage of my hero Kevin Rowland when he was in The Killjoys. I've rediscovered "One Chord Wonders" by The Adverts, what a great song!
I hate DVD's though, I can't stand the lack of control you have over them, that menu you have to keep going back to and the statutory warning that you can't fast forward! At least in the old days you could move swiftly past Simon Bates and his pirate phobia!
I'm up early this morning preparing for my mini tour. Christ on a bike, you'd think I was going away for three months, the stuff I've had to remember to take.
So no update until Monday by then I'm sure there'll be loads of post and pre gig bufoonery to talk about.
I hate DVD's though, I can't stand the lack of control you have over them, that menu you have to keep going back to and the statutory warning that you can't fast forward! At least in the old days you could move swiftly past Simon Bates and his pirate phobia!
I'm up early this morning preparing for my mini tour. Christ on a bike, you'd think I was going away for three months, the stuff I've had to remember to take.
So no update until Monday by then I'm sure there'll be loads of post and pre gig bufoonery to talk about.
Thursday, November 11, 2004
November 11 2004
I actually respected the 2 minutes silence to day ay 11am. Maybe what is happening out in Iraq has made me more aware of the sacrifices people like my Dad made during those two (less than great) wars.
I haven't written much during the last couple of days, computer problems and not really doing much the being the reasons.
I'm preparing for my mini tour starting tomorrow, in fact over the next few weeks I'm going to be on the road almost constantly. That, I like, however it does have it's own problems, I see less of my loved ones, my psoriasis always flares up and I eat terrible food and drink too much Stella. As a promise to Y I'll stick to ordinary brand lager and not too much of it...honest!
I'm excited about tomorrows "double header" the agent involved has taken care of the logistics, spoke to the clients, thus leaving the way clear for me to be side splittingly funny on two occasions at two venues! The second venue I'm particularly looking forward to. The Hull KC Super Stadium no less. Of course a lot of these new grounds don't compare favourably with the Mackem cathedral that is the Stadium of Light. I have been told that Hull is very impressive, not that I'll see a lot of it I'm due there at 10.30 and doing my stint at 10.45!
You know I hate Newcastle United so much I actually get up an hour earlier each day just to hate them that little bit longer!
FTM!
I haven't written much during the last couple of days, computer problems and not really doing much the being the reasons.
I'm preparing for my mini tour starting tomorrow, in fact over the next few weeks I'm going to be on the road almost constantly. That, I like, however it does have it's own problems, I see less of my loved ones, my psoriasis always flares up and I eat terrible food and drink too much Stella. As a promise to Y I'll stick to ordinary brand lager and not too much of it...honest!
I'm excited about tomorrows "double header" the agent involved has taken care of the logistics, spoke to the clients, thus leaving the way clear for me to be side splittingly funny on two occasions at two venues! The second venue I'm particularly looking forward to. The Hull KC Super Stadium no less. Of course a lot of these new grounds don't compare favourably with the Mackem cathedral that is the Stadium of Light. I have been told that Hull is very impressive, not that I'll see a lot of it I'm due there at 10.30 and doing my stint at 10.45!
You know I hate Newcastle United so much I actually get up an hour earlier each day just to hate them that little bit longer!
FTM!
Tuesday, November 09, 2004
November 9 2004
It's the real 9/11 today!
I started the day being interviewed by The Times today regarding Rob's obituary, it seemed strange talking about such a gentle man in the past tense especially on a day when a well known sportsperson passed away, someone I had worked with in the past. He was such an objectionable little racist that I have no symapthy over his passing. It strikes me that he managed to live a few days more than someone who was truly multi cultural and an anti racist..that's not fair in my books.
I took one of those, sadly rare, bookings today, a double header in Hull for this Friday, a nice little restaurant do then onto a sportsman's dinner with John Conteh later in the evening! Not too much hard work and a nice little earner, I will eat this month!!
Got a new mobile 'phone today, one of those video camera jobby's. It's cool, small and utterly perplexing. In the end I had to ring my eldest daughter A. (14 and full of Kevin the Teenagerisms!). It should come in handy at those strip shows I have to compere (under sufference) .
I'm also cooking dinner tonight (when did I start saying dinner instead of tea for an evening meal? Christ I'll be eating fucking Hummus next!) it's my speciality, Tuna Pasta Bake. In fact it's ready now so I'll be off.
FTM!
I started the day being interviewed by The Times today regarding Rob's obituary, it seemed strange talking about such a gentle man in the past tense especially on a day when a well known sportsperson passed away, someone I had worked with in the past. He was such an objectionable little racist that I have no symapthy over his passing. It strikes me that he managed to live a few days more than someone who was truly multi cultural and an anti racist..that's not fair in my books.
I took one of those, sadly rare, bookings today, a double header in Hull for this Friday, a nice little restaurant do then onto a sportsman's dinner with John Conteh later in the evening! Not too much hard work and a nice little earner, I will eat this month!!
Got a new mobile 'phone today, one of those video camera jobby's. It's cool, small and utterly perplexing. In the end I had to ring my eldest daughter A. (14 and full of Kevin the Teenagerisms!). It should come in handy at those strip shows I have to compere (under sufference) .
I'm also cooking dinner tonight (when did I start saying dinner instead of tea for an evening meal? Christ I'll be eating fucking Hummus next!) it's my speciality, Tuna Pasta Bake. In fact it's ready now so I'll be off.
FTM!
Monday, November 08, 2004
November 8 2004
I like days like these, got the house to myself, very loud punk rock playing and getting on with admin. Christmas bookings are now flooding in and I realise how much I missed doing them last year as I was in Panto in Leeds.
Seeing the trailers for the new Bridget Jones movie reminds me of when I went into WH Smiths to buy the sequel to the first Bridget Jones novel, forgetting the name of said book I explained to the assistant that I was lookin for a book by that "silly bint, single, lives on her own, no boyfriend etc" She exclaimed Oh! you must want that new Hannah Hauxwell book!" I was rendered speechless!
For anyone interested in my health, things seem to be looking up I didn't feel any pain when I woke up this morning so fingers crossed I'm getting better, obviously reading the newspaper reports of Newcastle being thrashed at home 1-4 by Fulham cheered me somewhat!
Had some really sad news last night, my friend, Rob Heaton, drummer with top Bradford band New Model Army died last Thursday of cancer. Rob was a lovely lad who had already battled through a brain tumour some while ago. He was a fantastic drummer and a keen supporter of local bands and had the hardest handshake known to man! R.I.P.Rob you'll be missed.
FTM!
Seeing the trailers for the new Bridget Jones movie reminds me of when I went into WH Smiths to buy the sequel to the first Bridget Jones novel, forgetting the name of said book I explained to the assistant that I was lookin for a book by that "silly bint, single, lives on her own, no boyfriend etc" She exclaimed Oh! you must want that new Hannah Hauxwell book!" I was rendered speechless!
For anyone interested in my health, things seem to be looking up I didn't feel any pain when I woke up this morning so fingers crossed I'm getting better, obviously reading the newspaper reports of Newcastle being thrashed at home 1-4 by Fulham cheered me somewhat!
Had some really sad news last night, my friend, Rob Heaton, drummer with top Bradford band New Model Army died last Thursday of cancer. Rob was a lovely lad who had already battled through a brain tumour some while ago. He was a fantastic drummer and a keen supporter of local bands and had the hardest handshake known to man! R.I.P.Rob you'll be missed.
FTM!
November 7 2004
What a fine time I had in that London, despite a four hour train journey! I arrived after a having a couple of cold stellas on the train and then a pint in that dreadful pub at Euston Station, a bit of craic with some Spurs fans on their way home after their game..footy fans always find each other I tend to think and it really does make strangers chat to one another, a good thing in my book (unless it's some heed the ball who wants to tell you his life story when you're reading a book on the train!).
I got changed for the gig in the (very roomy) toilets of a pub in Soho, something my Dad always warned me about! then a short walk to the venue. My gig was a 60th birthday party being held at a very posh Conrad restaraunt in West London. I had a small beer and signed the chitty, fuck me it was seven quid a bottle! Now I'm not doing all the usual sub Peter Kay bollocks about Northerners in London, house prices and the cost of beer, but seven pund for a bottle of Bud is obscene!
The gig was lovely, a room full of mainly Jewish families, some old some young. They enjoyed my act and I was gentle with them. As it turns out the MD of a large after dinner speakers agency was in the audience and she came over to introduce herself. I'd been trying to get onto their books for over a year so it was nice that a very ordinary nights work could have a significant bearing on my career.
After the gig I hotfooted it down to The Comedy Store to see PM perform in the late show, he was excellent, very professional and tight, the crowd loved him. I'd had trouble getting a hotel until my knight in shining armour did her stuff and I had a decent place to kip in Russell Square (that sold Stella in cans from a vending machine at only £2.10!). So I decided to treat myself to a bike rickshaw through Soho and to my hotel. It would've been great if it had been a young lass on the bike(maybe in a short skirt..) but alas all I had to look at were the buttocks of a very camp Aussie bloke for ten minutes :(.
FTM!
I got changed for the gig in the (very roomy) toilets of a pub in Soho, something my Dad always warned me about! then a short walk to the venue. My gig was a 60th birthday party being held at a very posh Conrad restaraunt in West London. I had a small beer and signed the chitty, fuck me it was seven quid a bottle! Now I'm not doing all the usual sub Peter Kay bollocks about Northerners in London, house prices and the cost of beer, but seven pund for a bottle of Bud is obscene!
The gig was lovely, a room full of mainly Jewish families, some old some young. They enjoyed my act and I was gentle with them. As it turns out the MD of a large after dinner speakers agency was in the audience and she came over to introduce herself. I'd been trying to get onto their books for over a year so it was nice that a very ordinary nights work could have a significant bearing on my career.
After the gig I hotfooted it down to The Comedy Store to see PM perform in the late show, he was excellent, very professional and tight, the crowd loved him. I'd had trouble getting a hotel until my knight in shining armour did her stuff and I had a decent place to kip in Russell Square (that sold Stella in cans from a vending machine at only £2.10!). So I decided to treat myself to a bike rickshaw through Soho and to my hotel. It would've been great if it had been a young lass on the bike(maybe in a short skirt..) but alas all I had to look at were the buttocks of a very camp Aussie bloke for ten minutes :(.
FTM!
Saturday, November 06, 2004
November 6 2004
Woke up feeling a lot better, though my phone playing up constantly and the Mighty Mackems capitulation last night against Millwall haven't helped. Had me hair cut something I have to do every 10 days 2 minutes three pund twenty and Bobs your number two uncle!
I didn't mention that strange gig I did in Nottingham last weekend..After a great journey down there and an hour driving around the city I found the venue over a Co-op! sixty desultory lads eating a dodgy buffet of tuna sandwiches and chips, awaiting the nights entertainment, me and two beautiful exotic dancers. Actually it didn't turn out that way, one of the girls didn't turn up and so the agents wife had to come out of retirement after three years. This didn't make the night an easy one. The first girl obviously had piles and her arse was like a badly packed parachute! The second lady (the agents wife remember) was sadly out of practice and this unfortunately had lads walking out in droves. This doesn't happen a lot at stag do's so I got up and did a lot more comedy than is usual on nights like this. I did well, the lads thanked me and I was finished very early..and I think I stopped a riot taking place! What a hero I am.
I'm off to that London this afternoon fortified by a full English breakfast (no egg!) I'm going by train and already I've been forewarned of delays. It should be a good night,well paid and a visit to see one of my favorite comics and the Godfather to my little girl M. I'll let you know how it went tomorrow.
FTM!
I didn't mention that strange gig I did in Nottingham last weekend..After a great journey down there and an hour driving around the city I found the venue over a Co-op! sixty desultory lads eating a dodgy buffet of tuna sandwiches and chips, awaiting the nights entertainment, me and two beautiful exotic dancers. Actually it didn't turn out that way, one of the girls didn't turn up and so the agents wife had to come out of retirement after three years. This didn't make the night an easy one. The first girl obviously had piles and her arse was like a badly packed parachute! The second lady (the agents wife remember) was sadly out of practice and this unfortunately had lads walking out in droves. This doesn't happen a lot at stag do's so I got up and did a lot more comedy than is usual on nights like this. I did well, the lads thanked me and I was finished very early..and I think I stopped a riot taking place! What a hero I am.
I'm off to that London this afternoon fortified by a full English breakfast (no egg!) I'm going by train and already I've been forewarned of delays. It should be a good night,well paid and a visit to see one of my favorite comics and the Godfather to my little girl M. I'll let you know how it went tomorrow.
FTM!
Friday, November 05, 2004
My first entry!
Thought I'd start with a new photograph taken of me at a fantastic comedy club. "Lock N Load" in Blackburn has been running a few years now and I've always had a great time there, one of the few clubs on the "alt" circuit I actually enjoy doing! The photo in question was taken on a night when I wasn't even supposed to be on the bill! What happened was, I'd just done a wedding at a notorious venue in Blackburn, Y had gone to Lock n Load on her own 'cos she'd seen a million nights like the one I was about to have. When I turned up at the wedding the bride was in the usual taffeta and unbelievably the groom was wearing a Burberry cap as well as his wedding suit...a truly "Chav" wedding! The gig itself was pretty good, they got most of my knob gags and the clever stuff sailed over their less then pretty little heads. So pocket full of chav cash I got a taxi and hoofed it out of there down to watch SH, an act I'd only ever seen in the north east. On arriving the promoter asked if I'd do a ten to fill in some time. I naturally asked SH if this was ok as I was to be going on before him (note to comics, it's common courtesy to do this and costs nowt!) He had no problem, so I stepped on to the stage to a fantastic welcome from a crowd that had only seen me headline there weeks previously. I arsed about a bit to be honest talking about the wedding I'd just done, but got some real laughs along the way! It turns out that the BBC were there and reviewed it! Phew!..could've shot myself in the foot with that one. A full review of the night along with details of the club can be found at www.locknloadcomedyclub.com
Well it's been a funny week in lots ways. It started well with a brilliant gig at the lovely Rosehill Theatre, Whitehaven. I'd driven over from Sunderland having done a sportsman's dinner with SAFC legend Gary Rowell the evening before. What a nightmare journey! first of all it was dark and raining so the A69 Carlisle was worse than ever and the stretch from Carlisle to Whitehaven seemed to go on for ever! It was a good turn out and my co-headliner JJS was superb, she warmed a nice crowd up perfectly for me. The compere JC struggled at times but his natural warmth and with set us both nicely. How did I do? Fucking stormed it! almost an hour doing material, riffing it and arsing about in a funny way ! My best gig for a long time This was my second gig at this theatre and second time I've done well. JC and I went out afterwards to watch a dreadful blues band "Men Performing Badly" they were called..weren't they?
Sunday disaster struck! I was taken ill with what I thought was a re-occurrence of the liver illness I had in April, an ambulance was called and I spent the night in Wigan Hospital doubled up in pain. It turned out to be similar but not as serious as April but a bit of a kidney infection alongside it didn't help. The TLC from the nurses certainly did and I've spent the last few days sleeping and slowly getting back to my old self.
Tomorrow I'm working in the West End of that London, tell you more about it then.
FTM!
Well it's been a funny week in lots ways. It started well with a brilliant gig at the lovely Rosehill Theatre, Whitehaven. I'd driven over from Sunderland having done a sportsman's dinner with SAFC legend Gary Rowell the evening before. What a nightmare journey! first of all it was dark and raining so the A69 Carlisle was worse than ever and the stretch from Carlisle to Whitehaven seemed to go on for ever! It was a good turn out and my co-headliner JJS was superb, she warmed a nice crowd up perfectly for me. The compere JC struggled at times but his natural warmth and with set us both nicely. How did I do? Fucking stormed it! almost an hour doing material, riffing it and arsing about in a funny way ! My best gig for a long time This was my second gig at this theatre and second time I've done well. JC and I went out afterwards to watch a dreadful blues band "Men Performing Badly" they were called..weren't they?
Sunday disaster struck! I was taken ill with what I thought was a re-occurrence of the liver illness I had in April, an ambulance was called and I spent the night in Wigan Hospital doubled up in pain. It turned out to be similar but not as serious as April but a bit of a kidney infection alongside it didn't help. The TLC from the nurses certainly did and I've spent the last few days sleeping and slowly getting back to my old self.
Tomorrow I'm working in the West End of that London, tell you more about it then.
FTM!
Monday, November 01, 2004
01 December 2004
"I saw the paper yesterday, and saw the obituary and I read about you dying in bed and I just couldn't understand it!.............. And I think of what you might have been, the man of such great promise"
That was Weller talking about his best mate who died from a heroin overdose in Woking in 1978, Hey come on! I'd love to be found grey skinned in some seedy hole and the whole of the comedy world saying what a genius I was!
Guess which part of it isn't going to happen?
FTM!
That was Weller talking about his best mate who died from a heroin overdose in Woking in 1978, Hey come on! I'd love to be found grey skinned in some seedy hole and the whole of the comedy world saying what a genius I was!
Guess which part of it isn't going to happen?
FTM!
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